While in Germany, we got on the topic of severe overcrowding at church - a situation that can cause the pastor to get sent to the pokey if not resolved... a suggestion was made that a way to deal with overcrowding was to ask people not to come to church anymore. Seriously.
After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I got to thinking... this could be a great blog topic... so here we go: what are the "Top 10 Ways To Get Someone To Stop Coming To Church?" I've listed a few to get you going...
TOP 10 WAYS TO GET SOMEONE TO STOP COMING TO CHURCH
1. Foster a "Dead animal smell" in the sanctuary.
2. Put large pad-locks on every cabinet and every door.
3. Make fun of people that show up late.
4. Draw all kinds of awkward attention to visitors.
5. Lock the front door of church exactly at church starting time.
6. Make sure the nursery is filthy & that last weeks diapers remain in the garbage all week.
I'll be waiting for one or two of your suggestions with baited breath.
After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I got to thinking... this could be a great blog topic... so here we go: what are the "Top 10 Ways To Get Someone To Stop Coming To Church?" I've listed a few to get you going...
TOP 10 WAYS TO GET SOMEONE TO STOP COMING TO CHURCH
1. Foster a "Dead animal smell" in the sanctuary.
2. Put large pad-locks on every cabinet and every door.
3. Make fun of people that show up late.
4. Draw all kinds of awkward attention to visitors.
5. Lock the front door of church exactly at church starting time.
6. Make sure the nursery is filthy & that last weeks diapers remain in the garbage all week.
I'll be waiting for one or two of your suggestions with baited breath.
15 December 2005
One of the things that is a by-product of international travel for me is that when I get back into the Pacific Time Zone (the best zone of all I might add!) I wake up ready to go at 3... that's great if I've got Petey's job, but I don't. I'm not much for tossing & turning either - the whole idea of 'trying hard to relax' kinda defeats the whole purpose of sleep in my book. So, I come downstairs & think.
Thinking is not usually hard work, but having your brain think it's noon while its only 3 seems to cause my CPU (central processing unit) turn to jell-o, which is good if you're Bill Cosby, but not so good otherwise. So instead of deep productive thoughts, I go random to unclog the machinery.
Thinking on school... 1 test & this semester is toast. 2 more to go for this go round.
Friendship is underrated - of all the things that I missed while in Frankfurt, friends were 2nd on the list, preceded only by #1 - my own bed.
People in Germany say they live in the West. I laughed the first time I heard it said, because they are 5500 miles way east of me & everything I consider to be in the east. Maybe its because they look to the "true east" of the orient or the russkies to be "the east" & because they're west of those areas, they're west. Maybe its more a culture or world view. I'll have to ponder that. Anyway, regardless of where they live or their nationality, people in "the West" seem to struggle with many of the same issues: insecurity. fear. unforgiveness. guilt & shame. pride. lack of self-control manifesting in severe depravity. inability to prefer spouse over other relationships.
It's interesting to me that when we "be being" transformed by the Holy Spirit, our own culture, habits, & proxemic distinctives are overwritten with a new "program" for lack of a better word. That's why we can have more in common with a Christ-follower in a foreign land than with a blood relative. Truly knowing & being known by Christ places new DNA in us, & what was true of us before is not necessarily the case any longer.
More later...
Thinking is not usually hard work, but having your brain think it's noon while its only 3 seems to cause my CPU (central processing unit) turn to jell-o, which is good if you're Bill Cosby, but not so good otherwise. So instead of deep productive thoughts, I go random to unclog the machinery.Thinking on school... 1 test & this semester is toast. 2 more to go for this go round.
Friendship is underrated - of all the things that I missed while in Frankfurt, friends were 2nd on the list, preceded only by #1 - my own bed.
People in Germany say they live in the West. I laughed the first time I heard it said, because they are 5500 miles way east of me & everything I consider to be in the east. Maybe its because they look to the "true east" of the orient or the russkies to be "the east" & because they're west of those areas, they're west. Maybe its more a culture or world view. I'll have to ponder that. Anyway, regardless of where they live or their nationality, people in "the West" seem to struggle with many of the same issues: insecurity. fear. unforgiveness. guilt & shame. pride. lack of self-control manifesting in severe depravity. inability to prefer spouse over other relationships.
It's interesting to me that when we "be being" transformed by the Holy Spirit, our own culture, habits, & proxemic distinctives are overwritten with a new "program" for lack of a better word. That's why we can have more in common with a Christ-follower in a foreign land than with a blood relative. Truly knowing & being known by Christ places new DNA in us, & what was true of us before is not necessarily the case any longer.
More later...
14 December 2005
Whew. I'm sitting at my desk trying to determine just where it is I should begin in dealing with the mountains of paper, mail, messages, & emails that await me. The best idea so far is to sneak out the window ala Indiana Jones (Holy Grail) & let it all sit for another day.
But, I just made coffee, so I'll be enjoying a cup or ten, then systematically shoveling through... I love this.:)
But, I just made coffee, so I'll be enjoying a cup or ten, then systematically shoveling through... I love this.:)
13 December 2005
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