how long...?

I've got 5 U2 songs that I rotate through as my "favorite." The one that is currently at the top is "40" - which is taken from Psalm 40, & combined with some selections from a few others of David's writings.

40
I waited patiently for the Lord
He inclined and heard my cry
He brought me up out of the pit
Out of the miry clay

He set my feet upon a Rock
He made my footsteps firm
Many will see, many will see and fear

And I will sing, sing a new song
I will sing, sing a new song

How long to sing this song?
How long to sing this song?
How long, how long, how long
To sing this song?

I am thankful for Christ's rescuing me from sin - for deliverance from the miry clay... & at the same time, I am also resonating with the "how long" part of the song (the Bridge, perhaps?)

Maybe its because I'm painfully aware that there are so many areas of me that need transformation... maybe because I'm weary, & wondering "how long" I'll struggle with the same things I struggle with. Pondering...

...a temper that flares & raises the volume... frustration with broken relationships, past & present... wondering when my kids grew up... disappointment from being let down. Again... how easy selfishness steals focus... playing politics, using God as a chess piece... people that walk on eggshells... being understood... getting some rest.

9 launchings into the blogosphere....:

No(dot dot)el said...

i can relate to feeling tired and weary of dealing with the same inner struggles that i feel i have been trying to change for FOREVER!! it really does get old and i just want to wave a magic wand and make it all go away. i feel your pain.

laura said...

I can relate to many of your struggles as well... be careful what you ask for, I am finding that being launched out of the "waiting room" and into "transformation" is just as uncomfortable as being aware of the struggles. Gotta love "the process" us humans get to go through here in life.

scoeyd said...

no..el- 1Thessalonians 5 - we will be changed in a moment. But until then, we keep on. & don't quit. And don't whine. Too much.

laura - mmm hmm. kind of a stream of consciousness... awareness. obedience. process. transformation. patience. persistence. realization. resolution. repentance. process. healing. joy. truth. melancholy. emotions. peace.

Erin S. said...

I feel the same way about my needing a transformation. But I think that it all comes down to just letting go control, completely. I think THAT is where the struggle is. Being out of control is scary and I'm really trying to push myself to fall down that rabbit hole. I think it's one of those one-day-at-a-time things. Not looking too much ahead, just saying "Today I'm going to give up control to You."
Anyway, that's just how I've been feeling lately.

laura said...

how long? Don't know about you... but from your list, looks like I still have a very, very long time:)

TimmyMac said...

"Boy's are strong . . . girls sing and dance . . ."

Just a little something Jadon has been saying lately . . . hope it made you smile . . .

No(dot dot)el said...

thanks for the scripture- are you calling me a whiner? :) hee hee!!

Chemane said...

Erin - I just had a conversation about that. How God gives us everything we need for TODAY, and that if we focus on God today that tomorrow will take care of itself. It sounds so easy doesn't it? If only it was so!

Plucky...thanks. :)

JayBird said...

the "pain" of transformation is sweet to my soul: often the pain now (honesty, introspection, behavior change, etc.) better positions me to tap into grace and peace in the future.